Yakitori Suprise

Yakitori Noodle Bowl
Yack Bowl: noodles, peppers, bok choy, garlic, ginger, scallions.

Pan Fried Chicken for StockThoroughly  roasted, but not burned!, chicken bits, as the base.

Magic Flavor Agens

Dark Magic (chicken stock, garlic, ginger, mirin, honey, cocaine, angel dust, the ghost of Keith Richards)

Dream Hot Tub

Combine the two and it makes two things, either the best Yakitori sauce on the planet or a wonderful skin application for an all-over glow. If you are leaning toward the skin application, your dog would like to pre-thank you.

Fried Tofu Most do not know this, but Tofu is made from Soy Bean. And Soy is made from Pork Belly (which is vegan). So… I would like to think that we have cleared up many things here tonight. Any other question can be mailed to: whatthehell?@AustinFoodJournal.com

A Tale of Two Pork Bellies


Pork Rice Bowl
Rice Bowl, with aforementioned protein product. Winner to be named later.

Dry Rub vs. Brine
Momo’s Chang goes with dry rub, Mission Chinese goes with a brine

Momo vs. Mission
They both have books that tell you they are the correct way to make pork belly perfect. I should write a book on how to not to commit suicide while starting a small food business.

Pan Sear
Chang just throws the thing into a roaring oven, then turns it down and let’s it go.

Braise Pork
The more complicated Mission method: score, braise, seared, and braise.

Both have their place. Momo’s is firm, lends itself well to cubed re-heating or re-frying. Mission’s falls apart, great for pulling. Personally, I would combine: slash, brine, dry-cook.


Noodles and Sauce and the Italy

Someone told me there is a country shaped like a boot and the people like to eat pasta. Sounds good to me. They got this pasta thing down! Satisfying, fast and red all over. This Italy place rocks! They should think about making sports cars.

Remember the low-carb diet fad? It sprung up in the 1990’s, then again in the 2000’s. Every few decades diet cookbook people run out of things to write about, so they resurrect it. Funny you should mention that, I’m in the middle of writing a diet cook book! It’s called “Go For a Walk and Eat Sensible Portions”.  People have been eating flour based food (bread and pasta) for 30,000 years. It’s amazing that we have survived this long.

You are probably already wise to this, but the Pasta Sauce is: organic San Marzano crushed tomatoes, white onion, garlic, red wine, smoked chili flakes (Springdale Farm), honey, oregano, salt, pepper and the belief that pasta alone will not kill you (I’m betting on traffic and taxes).

Things You Didn’t Know: Farmers are Rock Stars

The Remains

Austin has problems with farmers? Are you kidding me?! Farmers supply green space, jobs, education and let us not forget FOOD. ( I looked into food, and supposedly, it’s pretty important). Where did all this hate directed at farmers come from?! Farmers should be at the top of our list of things Austin needs.

Quick list of things Austin needs less than farmers: people who don’t like farmers, more asphalt, affordable housing that isn’t, city lawyers getting creative, Lamar converted into a toll road, cotton-candy machines at Austin High School, another wing built onto the Governor’s Mansion (unless it’s a greenhouse), another courthouse built on top of the downtown farmers market, the ghost of Ava Gabor (trust me, I’ve see that woman eat), Monsanto inventing a GMO Doritos seed, Mack Brown assuring us that we are going to win this year.

It’s not that I’m saying if the farms listed below vanish we will are all going to die… ok.., yes, I’m saying that if the farms below vanish, we are all going to die. I’ll be the guy standing next to you in hell saying I Told You So. Go buy a tomato you wretch! Sign up with the link below.